Saturday, April 27, 2013


The weekend is nice. The dog is asleep and dreaming. She's making cute little noises and it makes me want to hug her tight. So the other day someone said I have a beautiful face. Ofcourse I was very happy as anyone would be and it got me thinking about beauty. Recently I saw a video done by dove. A forensic artist drew portraits of several women as described by themselves and as described by a stranger. Ofcourse they were much prettier as others saw them. We are usually quite critical of ourselves. The mirror doesn't help as every spot, wrinkle and blemish become clearly visible. SO when someone says,"You have a beautiful face." you even go so far as to think that they are probably lying for some sadistic reason. I think all women have an inherent beauty and it has little to do with their physical features. Mostly it has to do with the light in their eyes, with their smile and so many other things. And yet I find it very difficult to think of myself as anywhere close to being beautiful. The husband is no help. I asked him if I was beautiful and he said yes ofcourse. Then I asked him why and he said, "You have a very nice nose like a button- on off on off." Clearly he is no help!

Tuesday, April 16, 2013

Dubai trembles

So I was sitting and lost in work when suddenly I began trembling with some force and my chair seemed to be bobbing up and down. I asked Harini if she felt it. She suddenly got up and said ,"Yes! yes! I thought at first you were erasing something on a paper and shaking the whole table." I thought that was quite funny that she would think that. So we all got together outside Sam's office. It seemed everyone felt it and it woke up everyone suddenly. Karren said," I was so scared Miss Parul! I thought someone was shaking my table but when I looked up no one was there! I was so scared Miss Parul!" Karren is our adorable Filipino receptionist. Sam couldn't stop laughing. Harini had her wallet and phone in hand and she said urgently," We should all go down." Rola replied,"Why?" And then Sam took a picture on her phone of all the hullabaloo. "for safety!" said Harini. "why?" Rola said again! Now we are all back to our respective chairs and worlds and quite safe. Thank you for your concern heh heh heh!

Sunday, April 14, 2013

Time and patience

I haven't written anything here for a while. I'm introspecting which takes a lot of time and patience. It also means that I have decisions to make and decisions are difficult things. They take time and patience. So I'm going away. Thank you for your time and patience.

Monday, April 08, 2013


Nothing much to report from the city of Dubai. The weather is back to it's sunny self and will become warmer as the days pass by. There are going to be changes at work. At the moment I'm not sure if they're good or bad. I think they're just changes and I have to take them in my stride and forge ahead. Ninna comes back from the kennel today finally. I feel like I haven't seen her for months and I miss her so much. 

Sunday, April 07, 2013

Cinder and smoke

'Cinder and smoke' by Iron and Wine

Give me your hand
And take what you will tonight, I'll give it as fast
And high as the flame will rise
Cinder and smoke
Some whispers around the trees
The juniper bends
As if you were listening

I randomly found this song and I like this guy. Have a listen.

Wedding and rain

Dina got married yesterday and it was a beautiful reception. Arabic music was n loud and everyone danced with joy. Dina looked ethereal in her wedding dress and Elie's sheer joy was visible on his face. I wish the couple love and happiness eternal. They make such a wonderful couple.

I wore a dress that I loved. I also wore heels which were basically instruments of torture and yet I forged on.

And ofcourse I took twenty thousand pictures, one of which is on the left.

Here's another picture of Dina and Elie swirling around at their first dance. So adorable!

It began raining last night. There was lightning and there was thunder and I loved it. It's still raining and I can't believe my Dubai could look like this, all wet and beautiful. There's a cold breeze and little drops of water are everywhere. I love the rain!

Friday, April 05, 2013

'Nothing in particular' the film

Nothing in particular

Above is a link to my film 'Nothing in Particular'. It was the third film I made at NID and probably my best effort at film making. I'm not saying that it is a great film, all I'm saying is that it is very close to my heart. Many of my friends are in the film. The production stills are in another post below called 3, Old Lane. Anshuman was watching the film and I kept feeling so embarrassed at listening to the voiceover. The voiceover is essentially the whole film. I remember how confused I was about making a film. I couldn't think of one thing that I wanted to make a film on. None of my ideas seemed any good. I sat in the old canteen for hours and wrote about all sorts of stuff blackening many many pages. This film for me is nostalgia of the best kind. Many of my friends are in the film. Anshuman watched it just now despite me cringing at hearing my words out loud. I'm so used to hearing my words only in my head or printed on paper that to hear them said out loud makes me feel like such a fraud. He thinks it's a wonderful film. The way he described it is,"You know it's like you have a maths problem and you throw up your hands in the air and say- I don't fuckin' care about the answer." Yes I was very confused and I ended up making a film about my confusion. I enjoyed every minute of making it. I wrote a little song which goes on the credits. My friend Ranjit played the guitar and sang it.

In some ways I'm still just as confused about life. The questions have changed. The issues have changed but somewhere within my heart I'm still the same girl blackening the pages.

Wednesday, April 03, 2013

Mask of the mummy

That scary looking mask is full of all sorts of goodness as Dr. Olimpia told me and judging by her skin I'm inclined to believe it. So I got myself a caviar facial and it was pampering and painful in turns. First my skin went through microdermabrasion which basically means that a small light sandpaper like vaccum controlled thing took off the top layer of my skin. Then the good doctor tried to clean the little acne on my skin with something pointy at which point I began yelping and she had to stop. She laughed and said,"You have zero threshold of pain." Again I'm inclined to agree with her. Two kinds of herbal goodness was massaged into my skin which was very pleasant and then I my face was covered by the mask which they later gave me as a souvenir. The mask becomes really hard upon drying for half an hour and mummies take it home for the kids to play with and paint on hence it is known affectionately as the mummy mask. After the mask a generous quantity of caviar essence was massaged into my face which was again very pleasant. I was told that usually caviar facials smell quite nasty but the Germans came up with caviar essence which actually smells quite nice. "As everything else the Germans have done it well." said Dr Olimpia. The woman is in her early fifties with the skin of a twenty year old. I'm seriously considering becoming a dermatologist in my next life instead of a famous musician. The good doctor said that the results will become visible in a day or two so I will wait until then to take the thousandth photo of myself. 

Sweet little lies

So I was listening to the only song by Fleetwood Mac on my playlist. I really like this song in Stevie Nicks' voice. She doesn't say much in the song, simply tells someone to tell her sweet little lies for a day. That seems to be a recurring theme in songs. I remember this song by Cheryl Crow in which she's saying something similar. Sweet lies seem more bearable sometimes than bitter truths. And yet the truth is the truth. It has no imagination while lies can take you on the gossamer wings of imagination to places you've never been. And while the truth may hurt it sets you free and a lie may sound sweet for a while but it will keep you chained to an illusion. If you're smart you will choose the truth every time. The trouble is that people in love invariably lose their smarts and then these songs are born So here are the two songs for the day. Enjoy!
Little lies by Fleetwood Mac

If I could turn the page
In time then I'd rearrange just a day or two
Close my, close my, close my eyes
But I couldn't find a way
So I'll settle for one day to believe in you
Tell me, tell me, tell me lies

Strong enough by Cheryl crow

Lie to me
I promise I'll believe
Lie to me
But please don't leave
I have a face I cannot show
I make the rules up as I go
Just try and love me if you can
Are you strong enough to be my man?

Tuesday, April 02, 2013

To the present

Ok let's get back to the present now. Wow that trip back in time was something else wasn't it? And now I'm back safely cocooned in the present. I have to go to the beauty salon and I don't really enjoy most of my visit. Most women will testify to the fact that it's mostly a festival of pain and yet month after month we go through it. The good part of the salon is tomorrow when I get to try the caviar facial. The funny thing is that I've never actually had caviar and tomorrow it's going to be slathered all over my face and I have been promised great results.

I'm going for a resort and spa review for the weekend. I'll check in Friday and then stay till Saturday afternoon and review the facilities, restaurants and spa etc. for the magazine. Then in the evening is Dina's wedding. I'm really looking forward to it. Anshuman will be back on Thursday and I think we're looking at a lovely weekend. Weddings are all about the dress. I bought a really pretty floor length dress that I fell in love with. I'm so looking forward to getting all dolled up. The 29th issue of the magazine is in it's final stages and I can't wait to see the dummy. I think it's going to turn out to be a good one!

7, Old Lane

Cultural day at NID. I wore my mother's saree. I can't remember who draped it for me.

Travelling in trains was a regular feature and so were khadi kurtas. As always I'm wearing my mother's watch.

A shoot for one of my favourite stores in Ahmedabad called Bandhej. The three girls are all my seniors and I don't think I spoke to them more than five words together during my entire stay at NID.

Another picture from the same shoot.

My first dog, a stray that I picked up in Ahmedabad. I remember I got him to my flat and immediately bathed him till he smelled like flowers.

The sun burnt tomboy wearing a red sweater, a red shirt and acid wash high waist jeans. I was probably 13 years old. This was taken at a school trip to Manali. I look so happy :)

6, Old Lane

As seen through Mukul's camera at our Bombay home. this was taken when we weren't married yet.

And then we got engaged in Delhi. My mother bought me a sari. It was the first sari I've ever owned. My parents saw Anshuman for the first time at our engagement. My fingers were much thinner then and now my engagement ring will never come off thanks to my fat fingers and because I don't want to take it off.

My mother in law gave me sweets I think as is tradition.

And then I got married to my wonderful husband.

Smoking away on my honeymoon in Simla. We took a lot of pictures on our honeymoon all of which seem to be missing. I will have to look for them in Bombay.

Directing a show at Zee during my television days. I'm holding my first cellphone which used to be Anshuman's phone and he gave it to me when he got a new one. I actually lost this phone in an autorickshaw. I remember I cried bucket fulls. I called the number several times. Someone would pick up and remain silent while I cried and pleaded at the other end. Ah well!

This picture was taken by Mukul and I sent it to my parents and of course they loved him :)

In the early years of marriage I wore two rings. My engagement ring on my left and a silver ring on my right hand. Enya sang aften as I wrote incessantly and filled many pages.

Monday, April 01, 2013

5, Old Lane

I spent a few months in a basement when I got kicked out of the flat I was staying in because the landlady's brother wanted to move into the flat. The basement was the only accomodation available. I spent my last days at NID in this basement. the hot plate was there in the middle of the two rooms one of which was inhabited by me. That's biswajit Hajra, Sonal, Swasti and Vandana one night. the great thing about this basement was the fact that you could never tell if it was day or night or morning or evening resultantly I slept a lot.

The walls had paint that was cracking and falling. I used to sleep on three mattresses stacked up on the floor. It was one of the most comfortable beds I've ever slept on and resultantly I slept a lot.

Smiling and content having just woken up. Did I say that I slept a lot?

That's Ranjit's twelve string guitar. The poor guy tried to teach me and I learnt very very little. I had all the passion but none of the persistence. You need both if you're going to be successful at anything pretty much.

And that's the end of posts today!

4, Old Lane

One early morning Shailaja my room mate decided she wanted to shoot people wearing leather jackets and blue jeans. The picture on the left is one of those images. Both the guys are called Rahul and the girl with the lovely smile is Vandana and the girl with the short hair wearing Rahul's borrowed jacket is me.

Another one of Shailaja's shots. That's Vandana with me boh of us posing next to the open brick wall on the girls hostel terrace.

This was taken at a friend's birthday. The lovely dusky beauty next to me is Priya who I'm sure said something really funny! Not to miss I'm wearing one of my long flowing skirts. I love long flowing skirts, so delicate and feminine.

Shailaja my official fashion portfolio photographer :)

All of us gathered together for a shoot on the girls hostel terrace. Tanuja, Anupama and I forgot the guy's name. I still remember this number 10 jersey which I wore for a very very long time.

Getting ready for garba. I do miss dancing garba every year. May be one day I will go back to Ahmedabad just to dance in a circle to the beat of a dhol.

All ready to dance. The only picture in which I have a middle parting.

Another photo shoot on the Girls hostel terrace.

The George Michael poster and the broken guitar that I never could learn to play.

Interviewing someone for my diploma film "Temple on the hill". Gesticulating as always.

The dictionary lamp, the candle holder and the ashtray. i bought this wooden ashtray from the Sunday market in Ahmedabad for 20 rupees. I still have it. I wonder who owned it before I did.

Another photo taken by a senior I think. I look annoyed for some reason.

A broken mirror, lamp and my favourite glasses. I wore them for the longest time. I've tried getting a pair just like them so many times but have been unable to find a pair. I don't remember who gave me the garfield box.

3, Old Lane

Well I decided to write another post even though I'm tired and coffee only serves to make me sleepy but I shall not sleep till I finish this post. Not that I would have slept otherwise for so many reasons. So here's a picture from the shoot of my film called 'Nothing in particular'. The story goes that I had to make a film. I had to put up a presentation of four years' work and I could only do that once I finished a film in completion of those four years. I hung around this space called the old canteen where this picture was taken. There was a small kitchen where you could get snacks in the evening and a coffee machine. I drank innumerable cups of coffee and smoked about a million cigarettes there. I always had a notebook to write in and I scribbled away incessantly all the time literally drowning in the pages. Sometimes when I had nothing to write about I wrote about my handwriting. In fact I wrote about my handwriting quite often. The girl sitting behind me is Tanuja who was one of my closest friends. I'm not much in touch with her now. She has two lovely boys and runs a design company called
'The Fool'. So I hung around wondering what to make a film about and no ideas came to my head. So I continued to scribble in my notebook. One day I went to Arun my teacher (in the picture on the right) and read some stuff that I'd written and he really liked it. He encouraged me to turn it into a film and I did. It was mostly about the transience of student life. I haven't seen the film for a very long time now. I think the last time I saw it was when Anshuman wanted to see it. Anshuman really liked it. I remember an ex boss who saw the film asked me if
I was drunk or high when I wrote it and I laughed and told her that I was high on caffeine. The woman sitting behind the table is my lead actress who essentially played me. I wrote the script and everything was ready to be shot but I hadn't come up with a title for the film. Arun was very patient throughout and I finally came up with 'Nothing in particular'. I will forever be thankful to that film for
giving me the title of this blog.
I made little cards for each shot and was at my organised best for the shoot which was mostly thanks to Arun. He is a very methodical and organised man. So that's the story of my film about nothing in particular and everything in general. I leave you with a few lines from the film. These lines are significant because when I was recording the voiceover my voiceover artist Tanuja became quite emotional and had to retire to the bath room to cry. She did come out of the bathroom to finish the voiceover and the film got made.
Here are a few lines that you hear as the film ends

"Today at this time in life you sit with your tears behind your eyes, your voice behind your tongue, your head hurts, your eyes hurt... you must have forgotten to drink water as usual.
So many people have walked through the alleys of your mind, so many have strayed into the cubicles of your heart that your memory walks out on you saying, " When are you leaving? "