Sunday, May 29, 2011


I've been asked more than once why I love boxes so much. I have them in all shapes and sizes with a plethora of things stored away in them. Recently I was looking for some papers and I opened up my old suitcase to find a shoebox full of memories we all seem to have. It has some pictures, some old negatives and a Hi8 cassette. This cassette has a video of a party that happened in one of my college friend's room. The interesting thing is that all of us shared our dreams in that tape. The tape ends with two of my friends chasing a rat and finally catching it. It's really pretty hilarious. This is all from memory ofcourse and I don't even know if this cassette works anymore but I will keep it for posterity.
Ever since I was a child I have kept things stowed away in a box. I spent a lot of time at my maternal grandmother's house as a child. There was a farm in front of the house and I spent a lot of time running around collecting beatles. I thought they were lost and I tried to give them a home in a plastic box. I would show them to my grandmother happily and she used to let them out when I wasn't looking. I could never figure out how they escaped every morning so I went out looking for them again determined to save them.
I collected loose change in match boxes so I could buy new pencils. I've always loved pencils and still do. You could read my post about how I stole a Leo Burnett pencil from a colleague's desk. The post is somewhere on this blog.Now I have a box for make up, for soaps, for jewellery that I never wear, for passports, for keepsakes, for anshuman's watch, for loose change, for stationary items, for anshuman's cuff links, for semi important papers, for important papers, for assorted wires, for bed sheets and pillow covers, for pictures and for things that I can't even remember.
It's the things that I forget that are the most important. When you open a box after a long time has passed by it suddenly brings the past back to your mind in it's full glory. It shows you things you may have forgotten that were once so very important. I try very hard to run from the past. I conciously try never to think about it. I have tried in my life to always live in the moment but nothing can take the place of the sheer beauty of nostalgia. And sometimes I give in and let myself be transported back for a few minutes till I find myself smiling and thinking to myself where did it go?
On a more practical note boxes are great for organizing stuff if you can remember what's in them. Almost all my friends bring me a box back from whichever country they happen to visit. Everyone knows if you want to make Parul happy, get her a box. So Anshuman brought back a lovely small box from Romania. It has three pearls on it and a picture of a little girl. There were three colourful beetles inside who are on my refrigerator now and look like they may fly away any second. So that's about why I have so many boxes. Also sometimes I wonder...may be I collect them because I'm secretive and possesive of my memories. May be...

Monday, May 23, 2011

in love

to me falling in love has never just been about a man. I've fallen in love with books, music and movies just as much. I feel the same heartache when I hear a song that I might have felt if I was actually falling in love for the first time.At every stage in life there has been a song and I have been in love with the song much more than I have been with the man. It seems to belittle the man but actually I can't help it. The emotions of a recorded voice can move you to fall in love and even do silly things like dance with yourself...alone and happy and the man you're in love with becomes a hazy image limited to an image of the dream you have of him . And then there's the fact that songs, books and movies last for life while a man may or may not. I know this sounds callous but I think it's also true.
Sometimes writers say things in a way that makes you want to believe them. You know that it's just a song or it's just a line in a book but something within your heart wants to believe there's a truth within the words somewhere. I have so much respect for composers, they understand a language that is not only universal, it is also the sweetest of them all. They weave notes that become a part of your heart for eternity and it doesn't matter when you hear the song, that part of your heart comes alive, it aches. it sings and sometimes it dances to a tune it has known for years and years.
Falling in love has so much to do with the song you listen to over and over again till a memory becomes indelible on the notes and then you may try to do away with the memory and listen purely to the words and the notes dispassionately but it takes a long time before you can do that. It's like getting over a deep trauma. Only time can heal you and no amount of objectivity and reality checks will get you through the pain of falling in love with a song.

Thursday, May 05, 2011

I'm ready

Sometimes I want to be able to write the words of the songs but I can' can't hear a song by just writing the notes unless you're a composer and have the music in your mind. What can I say, music is like blood in my veins. Sometimes I fall in love with a song and I listen to it over and over again for days and it's just so amazing that there are no words to describe it.
This song is one of my all time favourites. I've been in love with Mark Knopfler for so long that I think I simply forgot about this soulful song by Bryan Adams. If I write down the words, they're so ordinary but when Adams sings them my heart sings with him and I love it. I love it.