Thursday, November 29, 2007

Cleaning up and editing

So I have been cleaning up the house these past few days and bringing in new things. In the spirit of adding to the home I was going through some old pictures so I can put up some. Yes I was thin and therefore looked like someone else. I was with other people in another time wearing tie and dye clothes. Getting ready to do garba, looking into the mirror.
I have an album which has pictures of people on Cultural day putting menhdi on bald heads among other things. I am in touch with absolutely no one in this album and have no idea why I have it.
I found a dried rose and some torn photographs and I am blank. I don't know how that picture got torn and where the rose came from. Clearly I saved it for a reason all this time but I figured if I don't remember then it's not important. So I threw it away along with pieces of the photograph.
I realised that too many of my negatives are almost white thanks to everyone at NID shooting in low light including yours truly. Some wedding reception and honeymoon snaps came up. Some pictures of my pre diploma presentation made an appearance but didn't make the cut. I did pick one snap of me looking through the camera in a blue kurta which I kept wearing till it tore.
One of my favorite pictures is of four people, two guys and two girls laughing dressed in jeans and black leather jackets. Their joy is infectious even in the picture. I can sense our happiness even now. Three of these people are married but none to each other. No one marries their college sweetheart. Yes some people do but a large number of those finally go down the separation road to divorceville. Ok Ok some make it. Few. Very few.
I have a love hate relationship with my years at NID. These pictures are always tucked away in an adidas shoe box for a reason. It's like opening up Pandora's box and seeing a time when you felt invincible and vulnerable in the span of a moment. You fought little battles as if everything was a personal war. And you fought and fought because back then there was someone to fight with and we adhered to the rules not even realising that we did. And most importantly you won. And when you did there were at least a dozen people to cheer you on at any given point in time.
I don't know if I'm making sense. I have put away the shoe box back in the suit case on top of the almirah out of sight and by tomorrow out of mind.


Ady said...

That box will never get thrown out...and never sorted too! Some things are too difficult to let go of.....small but precious....and you never want to sort them out as that might result in you having to let go of some portion of those memories! Have a few things like those too.....which are religiously packed and reopened and repacked and taken along from place to place.

Roshan R said...

that line about college sweethearts never ending up together.. that is haunting for so many reasons... how i iwsh it weren't the waythings tend to end up..
similarly, finding old stuff u saved and not being able to recall why it was so important back then.. again reminded me a lot of myself

Gazal said...

I have a birthday day you gave me,when we were in the 10 th std...and a scrap book entry,where THE GAPPS GANG,scribbled and swore everlasting together...STILL LOVE TO READ ALL THAT.....

there is a lot of stuff we throw away,but somewhere it still lies embedded in the recycle bin of our hearts..safely tucked away

bitter or sweet..i don want to part with it.

i think you have stirred something in everybody,with this post

this one goes down in the "nothing in particular" hall of fame !!!!

pappu poppins said...

school memories tend to get a certain attachment of innocence to them, though i felt anything but that when i was conniving one prank or another...

Anonymous said...


Parul Gahlot said...

I don't know you from Adam literally and have no idea what that comment is supposed to mean. Do eluciate